I GOT MARRIED!!!

We did it, y'all!

I'd say it was a long road from when he said "yes," but honestly we didn't really begin planning anything until maybe 5 months before the original wedding date?

Yes, original wedding date. Which was October 26th, the weekend before our dating anniversary. And then the bride got COVID. The groom shortly after. You can imagine how devastated I was.

So November 23rd was our new wedding date. But hey, we reached our 16th dating anniversary, go us.

Oh yeah, and rain was forecast, hah. Thankfully it mostly came down during the night but we had a tent set up just in case.

Rewinding a bit... how we met!

We met during our senior year in high school, waaaay back in 2002! He'd transferred from his school in San Diego. My best friend Jenni and I first saw him under a tree near our hangout spot reading (Shogun was the book he was reading, he'd revealed later). We marched up to him and demanded to know who he was. After some coaxing, we got him to join our Frisbee games.

The three of us hung out a bit until after graduation, then he moved away for a few years. Fast forward to 2007 he was back in town. We all reconnected again, and about a year or so later, Paul and I finally shared our first drunken kiss after a Rocky Horror Picture Show showing.

The proposal!

After about 14 years together, the perfect opportunity to pop the question came up. After surviving COVID lockdowns together and the country opened up its borders, I was very eager to take Paul to Japan. I felt due for another trip myself, as I had gone once back in 2015. I had a plan up my sleeve to make it even more special and go during the cherry blossom season. 

I planned on visiting my dear friend Tomoyo of PinkHime, and I asked if she would take photos of the proposal. Not only did she do that, she got her husband Minoru involved and made a whole day of it. We took the train from Tokyo to Yokohoma, and met them at the station. They drove us to Negishi Forest Park since it was a popular spot for Sakura festivities. It was a bit drizzly so thankfully there wasn't a huge crowd. We did have to make it quick though, before the rain came down harder.

Collage by Tomo. They even brought us a cake, plus lots of snacks and gifts!

The rest of the day was for celebrating! Shabu Shabu lunch, and lots of shopping. An absolutely perfect day.

Wedding planning!

For someone who is pretty extra, I'm pretty chill and wasn't too concerned with the perfect wedding. But I had a vision for the whole thing. I wanted Barbiecore, of course.

I also don't love how I look in white, and I honestly had dreamed of the candy colored ball gowns I saw in the quinceanera shops in Downtown LA. I even saw a few online acquaintances go that direction for their own weddings.

Tiffany blue and pink (somewhat flexible on the shade) were the colors I had in mind. I gathered a few family members and my best friend and we started the hunt. Again, I wasn't out to be a perfectionist and didn't want to drag on the process of finding the "perfect" gown. So I went with the first one that was in my budget and worked with my vision. I, of course, planned to do some DIY so it also needed to get here soon-ish.

Paul's blue and pink suit was an even smaller ordeal. Second place we visited, they allowed mixing and matching, and the price included alterations. We had lunch and picked up the suit right after.

 

Over the next few months I'd make occasional weekend trips to Visalia to work on her!

I had quite the support system from having a best friend who is a pro at party planning and floral arrangements, parents with a huge backyard, siblings with connections and an eagerness to take care of all the small details. That's only scratching the surface. 

Jenni (my maid of honor, of course) did these floral arrangements in some Barbie corvettes that I thrifted (and some I um, already had).

The big day!

My dad took this photo of me eating bachelorette party leftovers for breakfast. I'll take this moment to say our official wedding photographer was OMB Photography!

Tomo had these chopsticks personalized and she presented them to us upon our engagement. There is a huge Japanese cultural significance in gifting chopsticks to couples, as they symbolize unity.

Tomo and Minoru couldn't travel to be there so here they are in spirit.

Paul's parents (far left) were there in spirit as well.

A collaborative banner my bridal shower guests made.

 

My hair and makeup took no time, but only because I went economy with Ulta. I honestly don't really recommend that, but they're a lifeline when you're trying to save some money. For what it's worth, I got my roots done at a local beauty school and was pleased with the results. 

Vintage Olga nightgown from The Lounging Goddess!

My dear mother!

Babygirl!

Best Man, Joe!

Maid of Honor, Jenni!

I love how many people played along with the pink and blue theme, even if the shades were different. My dad sported a cool retro slate blue as he walked me down the aisle.

Procession songs were "Plainsong" by The Cure and "Because" by the Beatles.

Ceremony is about 12 minutes but here's the Youtube vid if you care to watch!

There's my sister Jo-Anne officiating! If you're in the northern California area and need an officiant for your offbeat/secular/LGBQIA+ wedding, hit her up on Instagram @telestial_ministries!

The pronouncing us "Mr. and Mrs. Alphabet" was his surprise for me. 

Afterwards we went back into the house and had dinner straight away. I'd read on wedding forums that some couples would eat dinner in private but we ended up just eating at the kitchen table while the guests lined up for theirs. Worked out just fine!

Hawaiian Barbie-cue! 

Photos followed during cocktail hour.

Cake time!

Time for dances. Dad and I danced to "Dear Prudence" by the Beatles" and in the middle of the song Paul asked my mother to dance. 

 

I surprised Paul with our first dance song. I had only seen the anime series "X" recently but it's his favorite of all time. After the first few bars of "Sadame" came on he recognized it and immediately teared up.

Bouquet toss! Like hell I was tossing my bouquet that my mother painstakingly created for me out of brooches and junk jewelry so we made a mock-up.

Dance time! 

Hi Katie!

Off to our honeymoon suite! It was a total blast trying to fit my dress into Dad's Ford Woodie.

 The Darling! A super cool courthouse-turned-art-deco-hotel!

We actually met up with an old friend at the hotel and took a few shots around the place! Thanks Sonia for doing this! IG @isonia_photography_visions!

HUUUUUGE thanks to everyone involved.This day was better than I could have hoped for. THANK YOU. Paul and I are so incredibly happy. We felt so much love being around our families and close friends that showed up for us. 

Takeaways:

-Wedding culture is WILD, y'all. Browsing the wedding websites and Reddit forums, you see people die on the strangest hills (hosting your own bridal shower is tacky, ALL wedding guests should get a plus one, anyone who wears white gets red wine "accidentally" spilled on them, tee hee)

-That said, I'm SO glad fewer people adhere to tradition anymore. No garter toss for me, bouquet toss was open to anyone (and I stated that whoever catches it is the next one to adopt a puppy or kitten). No complaints, everyone had a great time.

-Even with the rise of nontraditional wedding dresses, employees at quinceanera shops get legitimately confused when you want one of their dresses for your wedding. Even at Serenity Bridal (where I got my dress, IG @serenitybridal_), the sales lady said it's not super common. 

-Not only did I have SO much help (seriously, thank you all so much), I am also lucky that I didn't have to deal with pressure over how things went. I can't believe how many families out there don't understand that it's the COUPLE'S day and try to make it into what THEY want. 

-My God, the  FACEBOOK ADS. Joke's on me though, I still like to look at reels of pink and blue quince dresses hahaha.

-It's amazing how perfect a day can turn out despite the, well, imperfections. For the record: there were supposed to be Tiffany blue runners on the pink tablecloths, but the party rental company brought seafoam. But they were used on the garage beams to present the booze, so at least that worked out.

-I can confidently say I was present for the whole day. In comparison, Rakuten Fashion Week was an absolute blur. 

 -I heard from several sources that people don't eat a lot of cake and you'll have lots of leftovers. Buuuuut our grocery store chocolate sheet cake was 7/8 eaten, though probably because it didn't taste like sawdust! Why don't more weddings serve chocolate???

-This was spot on though.. you don't necessarily have to include that damn Cha-cha Slide song, but if you want people dancing, crowd pleasers are a must. Anything that wasn't totally in the mainstream pretty much cleared the dancefloor. It was worth putting my musical hipster tendencies aside somewhat for one night.

 

Thanks for coming along on this adventure! xoxo Liz